The Wrong Side of my Car

The blog that wants to go obsolete

1 Dec 2020

Backyards

‘Backyard’ is one of those words that make a lot of urbanists full libtard. It is a taboo word and anyone who uses it is automatically an idiot and not worth listening to. *1

A backyard often comes up in discussions about high density living, and why it is necessary or not. Many people find it hard to imagine how anyone could ever tolerate life in a city without one. That is especially true for families — don’t miss that opportunity to howl the phrase “Won’t somebody please think of the children?”.

But is is said that having backyards is unsustainable, it takes too much space, so we should learn to live without one.

To understand this discussion you have to first understand the distinction between urban and suburban settings. Next, let’s look at some common arguments.

A child will grow out of that backyard anyway

That is true, but it is also not relevant to this discussion.

Think about it. If a kid outgrows a backyard it will definitely outgrow an apartment without a backyard. If you’re thinking about kids that will want to go out anyway, a backyard doesn’t prevent you from going out.

But the lawn mowing

It is probably true that many people don’t like mowing lawns, but many seem to think it is worth the effort.

But you can do your barbecue / party / soccer game somewhere else

I have certainly see people having a birthday party in Long Bay reserve, and barbecues are a common feature in our public parks.

There are pros and cons to this. It is still not as convenient as doing it at your home. Sometimes all those barbecues in the park are taken. It is hard to keep things cool. And you can’t easily go inside if it starts raining. However you probably won’t find a beach or a big playground in your yard.

But it is unsustainable

This is mainly because the total lack of any city planning skill in Auckland. We’re largely too dumb to fit both a house and a yard on a lot smaller than about 400 m². And too dumb to build small residential streets.

But this is not a binary choice. You can go as small or as large as you like. You could go down to 150 m², even if you really want your parking.

And while 6 by 6 metres doesn’t sound like much, it makes a huge difference for small kids. And that outdoor barbecue will be less awkward than in many Auckland houses with their tiny slivers of space between the fence and the house. *2

Why?

Yeah. Why do I want a backyard?

Privacy? Perhaps, although I think this is a bit overrated. Privacy is a double-edged sword, while it is often desirable it also implies isolation from other people. For playing kids it is actually a dis-amenity.

So why then? Two reasons:

It is safe: you can go there without fear of being overrun by traffic.
It is nearby: you can reach your backyard within a minute, even with small kids.

These two mean I can go go outside when I feel like it, and I can let the kids go outside without clutching their hands for dear life. I can teach my kid how to riding a bicycle. Simple things.

Streets or roads

And these are very hard to achieve in Auckland without a backyard. While things like parks and playgrounds often get all the glory, your most important public spaces are the streets. Streets can connect, or isolate. In Auckland they’re hostile, loud and dangerous spaces, where cars are the first class citizens. There is effectively no distinction between streets and roads.

You may have heard about street design from the Netherlands. The low traffic slow streets where you can ride your bicycle just on the street *4. Take a look at those 2 reasons why I’d want a backyard. If your streets are quiet and safe it becomes trivial to just walk out of your house to a nearby park. Or just have your kids play in the street.

While in Auckland, often times the streets are so unpleasant you will subconsciously avoid going out. This is why an apartment can be so claustrophobic over here. You thus become much more dependent on having a lot of private space (be it a backyard or a large house).

Don’t yell at people wondering about backyards. You’re shooting the messenger.

(*1)

A libtard is perhaps a generic derogatory term for a left leaning person, but I think the more specific meaning is someone who thinks of himself has occupying the high moral or intellectual ground, but unfortunately he gets nowhere in discussions due to a lack of empathy for people who don’t share his view, or privilege.

(*2)

If you think that design is a bit silly, it is because it is. Normally you’d forgo the off-street parking and make both the house and the backyard a few metres deeper. But hey, let’s break one taboo at a time.

This is another problem with high-density housing in Auckland. Where are you going to stack those damn cars?

(*3)

Images from Robert Weetman, I want my street to be like this. Go read that article. New Zealand street design is rather similar to the UK design depicted there. And it sucks every bit as badly as that article suggests.

I would love to know if low traffic streets are actually cheaper since you don’t have to engineer an entire 8 m roadway to carry cars. That would be double sad.

The best resource for seeing Dutch street design used to be a YouTube channel called “Ambuchannel”, sadly it was mostly erased due to privacy concerns.

(*4)

Maybe you haven’t and you’re thinking about their bicycle highways, and even an elevated roundabout somewhere. It is easy to get the impression that every street must have bike lanes over there. This is a myth. Many streets do not have features like separated bike lanes at all. The design of the street grid ensures they are not busy with car traffic in the first place.

This is what we get so horribly wrong in Auckland, and this is how we end up building an entire Northwestern Cycleway and have it used only by a puny 900 people per day.